After years of the runway strips and buck naked Brazilian crotches, there is suddenly a small comeback for the wild bushes. What’s a hair sprouting gal to do? Lets take a look at your options.

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Chances are you’ve swam in the red tide if you’ve ever had sex with a girl more than once. Still, for somewhat obvious reasons it’s something that most guys will not talk about, period.

Today I’m bringing the subject out of the bathroom drawer. It’s time to talk about having sex with a girl when she’s on her period.

Without further ado, here are the pros and cons of period sex.

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Your virginity is like a XXX Ed Hardy t-shirt. At first you wore it with pride, after all, it’s pretty expensive and everyone else seemed to have one too. Then, out of nowhere people started wearing better, hotter shirts.

Suddenly you felt weird being the only one still that ridiculous, over hyped t-shirt. Finally you took it off and found out how awesome it was to wear a silk tank top, or a cashmere sweater. Now you could wear anything you wanted, since you weren’t still clinging to that stupid shirt.

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So you’ve been out all night dancing with your girlfriends, wearing your hot new leather pants and keeping an eye out for that special adult friend that you sometimes hook up with. You hit the bathroom and as you’re pulling down your sexy pants you’re greeted to a very unsexy smell.

Oh no! It’s the swamp crotch! How can you go home with a hottie when your vajayjay smells like a Louisiana locker room?

Here’s a few effective tips to preventing your lady bits from becoming inedible.

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So, last night my strip club V card was taken.  Yup, I was brought to girls strip joint for the very first time.  I don’t know exactly how the nights events brought me there but it definitely was not planned.  Nonetheless, there I sat doe eyed as girl after girl did a XXX dance before my very eyes.  I watched as guys sat back silently staring intently at all the strippers.  Some with beads of sweat on their foreheads, others licking their lips as they used all the their will power not to touch (for fear of broken thumbs from a number of nearby bouncers).

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Confidence, confidence, confidence.

Be confident in everything you do from work to play.  This is especially directed towards you ladies.  You seem always have a problem with confidence and being proud of what you are and what you have.  I have always found that girls are the worst when it comes to comparing themselves to other women and being jealous or envious.  Here’s a secret.  Chances are they are doing the exact same thing as you.  You may love her skinny body where she love you career, clothes, hair, whatever.  Be content in yourself.

This confidence in your everyday life should most definitely be taken into the XXX bedroom.  There is nothing sexier than a woman who feels good in her own skin and can enjoy herself as much as I do.  When we’re standing there with a naked women the last thing on our mind is cellulite, flabby skin or love handles.  You want to know what we’re really thinking?  It’s goes between a series of thoughts that all range around “I’m getting it in” and “I can’t believe she’s willing to fuck me and put my cock in her mouth”.  So you should have no fear that we’re judging you.

Have you ever been having sex with a guy and him walk out of the room because of the way you look?  Probably not.  That’s because he would be crazy to do so.  So match that outward confidence you may portray in your day to day life and bring it to the your free sex life.  When we see you not holding back it makes us even more hot and makes us feel that we can have as much fun with your body as we want because you’re comfortable.  It’s actually kind of awkward for us when you get self-conscious because we don’t know what we should or shouldn’t do.  We definitely don’t want to offend you and get you out of the mood heaven forbid!

So, do everyone involved a favor and fuck worry free.  Let your confidence be your XXX cupid and match your confidence to our want for you.

 

So ladies,

Welcome to the wonderful world of breasts.  Yes, your ladies, tatas, hooters, XXX fun bags, boobs, whatever.  There are a billion and one names for a woman’s breasts and a billion and one ways a girl can utilize them.  Boobs can almost hold an unspoken language of their own.  Depending on how you present your girls will dictate how you are taking by society through the unconscious cue being delivered to them.

For example,

  • display them for the world and their extended family at a work location will result in you not being taken seriously
  • have them cloistered up and bond shows you want to be seen as professional but could be uptight and a hard ass

Now this is just at work.  When you are in a business environment it’s always good to play a happy medium ground to more conservative.  By showing just a little cleavage, you can help sway people to your ideas and wants.  Women were blessed with these girls for a reason so you might as well use them to your benefit.

I feel when you are away from work all bets are off.  If you want to have a XXX show at the bar and pretty much bare all then go for it.  Just remember you match who you’re attracting.  So if  you want to party and display your girls like that, you are going to get a party man.
A word of advice for all times of day when dealing with your breasts – make sure you display them to the best of their potential.
  • have the right bra –> get fitted because you don’t want a cup too big with width too short or vice versa
  • get an underwire if you need
  • go braless sometimes if your girls are on the smaller side and wear a sexy backless number
  • don’t make them too perky –> this is more for the older ladies who have wrinkled skin.  It just looks odd
These are just some beginner pointers.  I always encourage all my readers to visit you’re local La Senza or Victoria Secret for a quick demo on how to find the perfect bra for every occasion.  Trust me, your adult friend will surely notice the difference in presentation after you do.

So, on our blog the whole “Jack Rabbit Syndrome” was discussed concerning a males sexual performance and comparing it to the speed of this long eared friend.  Now, this a legit complaint but lets balance out this animalistic set up to the opposite sex.  Yes ladies, I’m talking about you.

Now as guys we love when a girl gives us free sex in any shape, way or form but if you want to stand out for us as a XXX sex fiend do not be a “Wet Fish”.  Well the wet party is actual a good thing if you want to argue semantics with me right now but I’m focusing more on the aspect of what a wet fish does.  You may be thinking to yourself “well fish seem slippery and rather agile” etcetc.

You’re not wrong but I’m not referring to a fish in water.  I’m referring to a fish who has been beached on land.  Now that you have that visual fresh in your mind, what do you see?  You see a sad looking, lifeless, sponge that is drying up with every passing second.  You see a faint distant look in its eye as it doesn’t make a sound.  Hell, it could be dead you wouldn’t know.  Maybe once in a while you’ll see a random twitch if you look fast enough but that’s it.

Well this is what you look like when we’re having sex and you don’t move.  It doesn’t matter if we were the perfect match mentally all throughout the date but if your a wet fish in bed, chances are we’re not hanging around too long.  I’m not saying this to be a dick.  I’m saying this to help you as an adult friend.  It’s friendly advice.  But what guys like the most is to know that the girl is into them and into what we’re doing.  If you’re just lying there looking unimpressed and virtually dead it freaks us out and can send some of us into a panic mode.

So ladies, please.  If you’re feeling it then show us.  I’m not saying pretend.  If you’re not into having sex last any longer than it has to then I’m sorry.  But if you enjoy it then get in on it and move around, grab at us, scream out.  Anything.  Everything.

Sex Yourself

Sex yourself?  What the fuck does that mean you ask?  If you don’t know, I feel very very sorry for you and I’m here to help.  To sex yourself is to double click the mouse, jerk off, take a stroll down cum city for one, basically MASTURBATE.  It’s ok you can say it.  Almost everybody does it and if they don’t they are missing out.  Even if you get regular sex and it’s good hot fun, you should still try XXX touching yourself.  It’s a healthy way to bring a whole new level of satisfaction to your mind and body.  Studies prove that orgasming releases chemicals in the brain that up your mood.  And who knows how to make you feel good then yourself.

XXX Toys

So touching yourself is awesome.  I’m saying this from years of experience but you can take it further than just touching yourself with your hand.  There are thousands of XXX toys that can keep masturbating exciting and varied in your life.  If you take the time to look these toys are everywhere, even the grocery store.  Don’t believe me?  Take a look in the contraceptive section.  Mini vibrators can be found as a bonus to a box of condoms or lube!  It’s like getting your cracker jack prize in your cereal box.  WIN WIN!  For more variety of course, check out a sex shop.  You don’t have to feel timid while in there because everyone is looking for the same thing.  A way to get off.

Free Sex for One Please

I hate those people who say “ew” when talking about masturbation.  This is especially true in females.  Getting yourself to cum is like having free sex!  No strings, no drama, no buying dinner first and you know exactly how to do it.  If you want to add another level of excitement try touching yourself in front of your sex partner while they touch themselves and match the time that you both cum.  It makes the rush that much more thrilling.

Match with Your Wants

The most important thing to note about masturbation is human beings do it because it feels good and makes you happy and there’s no shame in that.  There is no exact number on what’s too much or too little as long as it doesn’t disrupt your day to day life.  Sometime’s I’ll do it in the morning as I’m waking up to give myself that jolt while other times I’ll take a mid day break to do it.  Cumming is not on a schedule so don’t ask it to be.  Like sex, it can be hottest when it’s spontaneous.

 

I’m sure everyone who has sex or at least of an appropriate age to have sex knows what lube is.  I’m not talking about the kind you put in your car to help grease up the engine (although greasing up an engine doesn’t sound like a bad idea either).  I’m talking about the kind you use to get you and adult friend or partner XXX ready.  That wet and wild feeling that ensures a long and full night of fucking.

I know I look at my lube as my mini XXX cupid that makes everything more pleasurable, including those lonely nights alone doing the knuckle shuffle.  But how much do you really know about lubricants?  I are an Einstein of everything there is to know from brands, types, and textures or do you just quickly grab any ol’ thing off the shelf and embarrassedly head to the self check out.  With lube there is nothing to be ashamed of because we all could use it at some point, if even just to help take that stick out of your ass to help you relax.

For those that are still a bit in the dark I’ve made a quick list of the basics behind lube to help you decide which ones would match your preferences.

They can come in different kinds from water based, to silicone based, to water based with glycerine, and also oil based.  I’ve found the most popular to be the silicone based lubricants.

Water Based Lubes – fun and easy to use but dry up quickly.  They work for any form of sex and protection but need to be reapplied often.

Silicone Based Lubes – are the latest and most popular lube and can be used for any type of sex and protection.  Smoother texture and do not need to be reapplied as often as water. (side note: don’t mix with silicone sex toys as it breaks down the material)

Water Based Lubes with Glycerine – are easy to clean up like its pure water form counterpart but last just a little bit longer.  This form however can sometimes cause some infection in the vagina (ie. yeast infection)

Oil Based Lubes – are supposed to be solely used for masturbation as it takes the vagina a long time to break down the oil and is not compatible with latex (causing it too break down condoms etc)

Feel free to experiment with colors, flavors and brands as there is many out there.  Fuck, you can even get lubes that have multi purposes and heat up (good for a pre-massage to get her in the mood).  Just make sure you read all the labels first before making your decision.  Like a contract, there can sometimes be fine print.

Now, I’m not medical doctor but these are the basics I’ve come across in my time.  Should you have any questions that are more detailed you can always contact the company or your doctor.

Happy Humping!

 

About this blog

Welcome to the one stop blog for sex advice, XXX topics that you can’t ask your doctor and how to become your own adult cupid. Anything that makes your knees quiver and pupils dilate can be found on our blogosphere. We’ll tell you how to match with your best vibrator and identify what sex position will get you and your partner to cry out the big O.

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